Letting go...

 This was a test, a test from the gods and men. For us to prove our worth...

I saw the cave, that cave, the cursed cave. The cave where my first party died, where the men I love died. Tysgard was at my side, bumping me as a sign of support. And we walked in. A curve, two... and then the hall. That open space built in stone where he was, Samir. 

Standing tall, with worry on his eyes. He lifted his hand, yelling at me "you have to go!" with anxiety and worry in his voice. And I just couldn't. "I am more powerful now" was my first thought and tried to push forward, trying to face the danger. But forward in the cave, it was him again, looking at me, worried... "You have to go, you have to live for us" and something breaks in me, I can't, I can't leave him again. And I take his hand and try to vamp us out using one of my most powerful spells. 

And the light goes brighter and we don't move an inch.

Tysgard, behind me, lifts his voice "you have to let your guilt go" and it makes sense for the brain but not for the heart. I turned and Samir was there, tall, with his arms open and looking at me with pride "You have to let us go" says again with kindness and wraps me with his arms. My eyes fill with tears, and he kisses me... and I can't hold the tears. It's been so long since I've seen him, since I felt his embrace...

And I know what to do...

I kiss him, one last time. And I try to step back, and it hurts like if I was ripping up a piece of myself. I took a deep breath and completed a step back... and another... and without looking back, we left the cave. Tysgard and I, just heading back to the party.